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[Eng] 改文 請狠評 - CE Eng 08 Paper 1B Task 1

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改文 請狠評 - CE Eng 08 Paper 1B Task 1

ENG CE 08 Task 1

I think the theme park should be related to planes and sports.  The park may be of a differential feature in comparison with other theme parks.  There is no doubt that youngsters will be all eyes at this distinctive and attractive park.

I think this type of theme park would attract young people because youngsters are looking for excitement and they are enthusiastic about planes and sports.  This park may offer exactly what they are in search of.  All over the park there may be avant-garde designs that draw teenagers' attention.

The kinds of activities people could do there would be of a wide variety, ranging from games to parties.  First of all, the park would offer a wide variety of plane games which are designed in a modern way such as ‘Aircraft Battling’.  On top of that is ‘The Simulator’, a game in which people may drive planes.  It would definitely draw the teens’ attention.  Secondly, there would be little funny games to resemble the Olympics Games such as ‘Jump Over It!’, a game like high jump in Olympics.  Youngsters’ enthusiasm about Olympics can be aroused.  At last, sports parties may be held frequently by inviting Sport stars, like Yao Ming, to have sports performances.  Refreshments would be served in the party.  Youngsters may enjoy the food and chit-chat there.  They may also master the sports skills through playing sports together.

THX!
希望可以評分 + 評語 + 改進方法
謝謝!

[ 本帖最後由 funni 於 2010-3-30 01:53 PM 編輯 ]
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