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投票項目 ( 單選 ) 參與人數 64

1. lv5*
2. lv5
3. lv4
4. lv3
5. lv2
6. lv1
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作文評級 thx

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作文評級 thx

Write an article for your school magazine discussing the pros and cons of keeping pets.


Pros and Cons of keeping pets




There is a growing trend of keeping pets in Hong Kong. Much has been said that we can find the delight of keeping pets. However, what is worth noticing is that isn’t it a waste of time and money? To begin with, I would like to explore the pros and cons of keeping pets.
One of the advantages of raising pets is that pets bring happiness to us. If we feel upset or lonely, pets are always our best companions that make us delight and reduce our loneliness.
Apart from providing happiness, pets also increase our responsibility. When we are raising a pet, we should take care of him, provide the food and clean his excrement regularly. Therefore, it will be effective to improve our responsibility.
While some people think keeping pets is worthwhile, some see their pet as a burden. Keeping pets can cause some disadvantages which cannot be disregarded. The major concern comes from the time and money. When we are raising a pet, we are not only providing the food for the pet, but also spending time on him. Therefore, keeping pets can be time-consuming and costly.
Further more, keeping pets can make many bother.For instance, if your pet is so lively, he may make a mess of your house. What’s more bothersome that he may bark at every night and disturb the neighbors.
To restate, keeping pets can be the benefits and drawbacks. If you decide to raise a pet, you should think before you leap and provide pets with necessities.








[ 本帖最後由 abc8613 於 2009-5-7 09:40 AM 編輯 ]
   

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Just scan through it.


1. delight is not appropriate.
2. pets also increase our responsibility. [meaning unclear (words missing) ; singular/plural]
3. Are all the pets male?
4. 2nd pt is not very effective.
5. When we raise a pet... (not we are raising)
6. Furthermore (one word)
POST 文者請注意: POST 之前請PROOFREAD 清楚

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呢篇野好明顯係由DEREK LIU篇文汁出來的

add oil

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夠4,上年我寫夠字數冇離題都4

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引用:
原帖由 plato123 於 2009-5-7 10:25 AM 發表
呢篇野好明顯係由DEREK LIU篇文汁出來的
Year, Capture A

Theme: Pets!

Anyway, no need to treat the tips seriously. Derek is always a good teacher in English Exam. Learn the skill instead.

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篇文比我的感覺係有d點到即止
一part 得果2-3句 吹得唔夠

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at least lv4. points are clearly stated but should be further elaborated. occasional grammatical errors.

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However, what is worth noticing is that isn’t it a waste of time and money?
一眼睇落去...呢個好累贅

愈睇落去愈覺得唔似係一個人自己作...
好似係抄完人D範文
再自己改左後半part佢禁
怪.....
個style 唔同左...
錯左D野- -

[ 本帖最後由 沉默仔 於 2009-5-7 10:40 PM 編輯 ]
[url=http://littlesoldier.net][/url

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唔記得講grade, 我會俾3 only
POST 文者請注意: POST 之前請PROOFREAD 清楚

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